The Kingdom Mother

 














 My mother is turning 87 this month. Her health is not good. She has breast cancer.

At her age nothing is being done about it.

My sister just told me that mom recently quit eating well and has lost a lot of weight.

Of course my thoughts are of her coming to the end of her allotted life span.

I feel melancholy and unsettled about all of this. 

All of us are bonded to our mothers in many ways.

The shared memories are flowing into my recollection as I deal with my own sadness.

I have not visited her much in my own busy life.

My sister has seen her almost daily.

I know mom is close to the end of her life and I hope I can have some meaningful time with her in the meanwhile.

***

When the book of Genesis speaks of a man having sexual intercourse with his wife, various expressions are used.

The King James Version of Genesis 4:1 states: Adam knew his wife....

Genesis 4:17: And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived....

Genesis 4:25: And Adam knew his wife again, and she bare a son....

The New American Standard Bible expresses it by saying: ...had relations with his wife.


  Genesis 38:15-26 tells of the relations involving Judah and Tamar.

When Judah found Tamar, his daughter-in-law who was a widow, dressed in the clothes and veil of a harlot, he said, "Let me come in unto you." Verse 16.

She bargained for a kid from his flock to be the price, and received his signet ring, bracelets, and staff as token payment.

Later, not recognizing her, he was going to have her burned alive because she was found pregnant by whoredom, but she said, "I am with child by the man to whom these things belong."

Judah then realized the double standard.


  In human relationships there is a difficulty in having deep communication.

The phrase "knew his wife" used by the King James Version indicates that it is a deep plane of communication.

It goes beyond physical intercourse.

It involves an understanding, a relationship where there is shared knowledge of each other.

It goes beyond intimacy, and it speaks of deep communication.

What is there really to "know" about a woman, about a mother?


  It is not easy to understand a woman, but you can know her.

You can know her desire to give and to be accepted in her giving.

You can know her deep capacity to identify her whole being with her husband and with her children.

It is difficult to understand, but you know it is there.

When a son goes astray, his mother's heart is broken because she is so identified with him.

She knows her children- their problems and their potentials.

She has a participation in their hurts.

She rejoices in all of their achievements.

This is why it is important to understand and learn about a Kingdom mother.

  There are levels of deep communication that should exist between a father and a mother.

We read first the physical level in the beginning of the Bible, ...male and female He created them.

Genesis 1:27.

In a beautiful way, He made them heirs together of the grace of life ( I Peter 3:7 ).

But besides the physical communication which includes the sexual, there is an emotional communication on the many levels that a man comes to know and to understand a woman.

He shares her joy as well as her anger, jealousy, and anxiety.

A woman is human and subject to human frailties of her emotions unless God puts a curb upon them.


  Another level of communication deals with the mind and speech when a couple sit and talk.

But unless their spirits are united, they can talk all day and neither one will know what the other person is saying.

All of these various levels of communication-the physical, emotional, the mental and even the articulate- mean nothing at all unless there is a level of spiritual communication.

When the Word says that Adam knew his wife, it is talking about something far different than just having a little knowledge of her.

It means a blending together.

They were excluded from the garden.

In the midst of judgment they faced many problems and difficulties; but they faced them together with a deep understanding of how they were going to walk through those difficult times.

That type of knowledge bonds people together.

That is one reason why God instituted the feasts.

for instance, whenever we keep the Feast of Passover or the Lord's Supper, we are going back and remembering experiences that bond us together with those who have gone on before.

When we keep the feast of Tabernacles, it is a remembrance of the children of Israel traveling in the wilderness.

By the recounting of those observances, we share experiences that bond us together.

These are what makes the feasts and the Communion so effective as a way of ministry.


  For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh. Ephesians 5:31.

They are one flesh, but they share more than just the act of sexual intimacy; they share experiences together.

This is more than many young people anticipate when they get married.

A mother is close to her family because of all that she goes through for them.

Families are close together because they share experiences together- they live together- and this bonds them in spirit.

And that is what God does with two people that He brings together.

Those who have prayed together and sought God together for answers have that true sharing in of experiences.

No one is so impoverished as the person who has never had anyone to share his life.

While sharing in one another's lives we become deeply bonded together.

When we become aware of this, the bonds are established.

As people grow older, they usually begin to feel closer to their parents.

As children, they may have been upset by the frustrations and the restraints, but later on they have memories of many experiences that they shared, and memories restore the bond that was created by a mutual experience.


  Pity the grown man who never became aware of his mother, who never became aware of how she participated in his first breath, or how she met his need when he had his first hunger pangs.

Are you aware of how your mother participated in the first helplessness of your life and understood it, how she participated in your fears?

She was there when you took your first steps.

She helped you develop an awareness of things in life and rejoiced at the first discoveries that you made of the world around you.

She was delighted with the first words that you ever spoke.

Do you realize that this is what makes you close?

She is bonded to you because she shared these experiences with you.

You are indeed a poor person if you are not aware of the way other people participated in your life and you in theirs.

The members of the Body of Christ must have the same care one foe another.

They must have an awareness of how they live together, walk together, and eat together.


  A father can identify with a mother because he sometimes has a part of a mother's spirit in him.

A mother remembers with joy the first time a dirty, chubby hand reached out with a dandelion bouquet.

She remembers the first serious art production that was brought home from kindergarten. 

She remembers when the baby took his first step.

What a joy it is for a mother when her children first open their hearts to Jesus Christ, and when they receive the Holy Spirit.

Mothers, always remember listening to the chatter of their children.

She never forgets when a child tied his shoes for the first time.


  What is a Kingdom mother?

What is she like?

What is she doing?

What are mothers trying to say?

They may feel that life is speeding by and they do not want to miss what God has for their families.

Many mothers are silently crying out, "Don't wall me out; always need me.

Don't just use me or take me for granted, but share all of life with me."

She may contradict herself, crying out, "Help me, I am a woman," and the next moment she is saying, "Let me help, I am a woman."

She will say, "You are a big part of my life; let me be a big part of your life."

She may say, "Don't fence me in," but really she is saying, "Don't fence me out."

She tells her child to make the most of today.

If he says, "Today was terrible," she will reply, "Tomorrow will be better."

A mother may say, "I need you, I can't do it."

Then she will turn around and say, "You need me, I can do it."

A happy family has a mother who balances the do's and the don'ts.

A mother who only says "don't" to her child is harming that child.

She freezes his life.

A mother who only says "do it" to her child has not put the restraint on that child that it needs.

A good mother balances the dos and the don'ts.


  A mother says, "I will never forget you, for you are a part of me," and then, "Remember me, and let me always be a part of you."

Children take on their parent's physical form; they are of their flesh and blood.

It is very necessary for parents to always feel like they are a part of their children.

A mother can say many times that she loves her child, and each time can have a different meaning completely.


  What is a Kingdom mother like?

She is more concerned about liberating a ministry than she is in womans' liberation.

She wants her discipline to be corrective, though sometimes, it has to be punitive.

The spiritual mother is doing something that children need today: she is teaching her child to respect the rights of others.

She is going beyond that and respecting the right, the identity, and the future and ministry of her child.

Some mothers have loved their children, but have not really liked them.

Have you ever loved someone whom you really did not like?

The Kingdom mother comes to like as well as to love her child.

She can do that because she has faith for what her child will become.

Her relationship to her child is based on faith for what her child will be, for what God will make of that child.

Therefore she accepts that child with his many qualities and problems without forsaking that child.


  The Kingdom mother is a worshiper.

She teaches her children to worship.

A Kingdom mother must never be afraid of her children.

Many woman are afraid of their children, and so they are apologetic and do not want to cross them.

They even hesitate to discipline them.

A mother cannot be afraid of her children.

It is a deep basic psychological fear that too many women have.


  If a woman has a child, God will give her the faith to raise him.

He will give her the authority to deal with him.

She must have faith in what she is.

No one is adequate to do anything.

The act of giving birth to a child does not suddenly make a woman a glorious, idealistic mother.

God must give her the wisdom and the help.

She cannot be afraid.

She must enter in and have faith for the child, without drawing back.

The same is true of ministries; when they draw back they cannot meet the person's needs.

A mother, with her purpose and her love, has a strong focus where otherwise she would be vulnerable.

She has certain qualities that are almost frightening.


  A mother is freer than most people.

A father may be confined to his job, but many mothers are freer in their time.

Yet, in other ways, a mother is more tied down and more a servant than the rest of the family.

A mother can be a queen, or she can be a servant.

She will be a queen if she makes her husband a king, but not otherwise.

A husband must also wisely love and take the spiritual authority to be king if he wants to live with a queen.


  We create each other by our faith,by our own positioning.

In the Kingdom, the families and the homes will be far beyond what any of us have seen so far.

There should be more ministry to the families.

Each brick that is used to build the beautiful wall of the Kingdom is a family.

We are being built up into the family of God.

Many homes are tested to the utmost, and sometimes they break up.


  More Kingdom mothers are needed because the family life is in jeopardy.

More mothers are needed who will understand how to minister to children.

All these go beyond the deep instincts of motherhood.

These are abilities that mothers will have to acquire.

They need the impartation from overseeing elders to help them become mothers who will be pleasing to the Lord.

Related to that is the commandment in Exodus 20:12; Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land....

Paul the apostle said,"This is the first commandment with promise" (Ephesians 6:2).

Those who honor their fathers and mothers come into the respect and the submission that God demands.

Angelic protection is over the little child who is submissive.

The angels of God do not look upon or minister to those who are in rebellion.

If a child is in divine order and is submissive, his days will be long in the land.

God's protection is over him if he obeys and if he is submissive.

He is protected from the enemy when the submission to honor his father and his mother is in his heart.


  Mothers have much to live up to.

Sometimes the word mother could be changed to "smother."

That is what some mothers do to their children.

A good mother knows how to bring her children forth.

A mother can be creative, or she can be destructive.

She can be the greatest help to her child in his early years, or one of the greatest hindrances.


  Many mothers feel that they need help, above everything else, because they want to be real spiritual mothers.

Mothers identify with their children and their needs, but they need to know that the Lord identifies with them, that He understands their needs.

Usually it is the mothers who are the most under self condemnation.

They feel so many times that they have failed.

They have such high goals of faith which sometimes they do not see come to pass; therefore, they must have the long suffering of the Savior Himself.

They must believe that the adequacy and their sufficiency as a mother will come from the Holy Spirit.

An anointing must be upon them to bring forth ministries in the house of the Lord.

They must not fear nor condemn themselves.

Who is sufficient for the need; who can meet it; who can buck up against the evil of this world?

Only the Lord is able.


  Do not be looking into the future to start living.

Live your life right now.

Exact from each day what life should mean and enjoy it.

Parents, enjoy your children.

Children, enjoy your parents.